So many kids want to be famous, it is a staple of childhood dreams. "I'm gonna be President someday," etc. Then we get older and realize that the American dream is, arguably, to be rich and famous. We get through high school, graduate and for some us repeat the process through college and beyond. Making our parents proud, making our siblings and friends drool with envy, as fully formed adults, isn't that enough reward as it is? Not without lots of cash, it isn't. We need to accumulate "stuff," material things that we wear as a badge of accomplishment to impress complete strangers. "He who dies with the most toys, wins!" Sound familiar? The circle is complete, back to square one.
Yet there is a very large downside to fame: the sacrifice of one's privacy and perhaps dignity. There was a young freshman who arrived at my smallish college one year. She was the offspring of two famous Hollywood actors, long-since remarried to new spouses, they were the "Brangelina" of their day. The daughter of that union was an instant sensation the moment she arrived at our cloistered campus. I heard many stories about the hottest freshman ever to set foot in our ivy-covered halls, though I hadn't yet laid eyes upon her. Frat boys and undergrads alike were in love with the very idea of her--rich, famous, and certainly gorgeous; with genes like that, how could she not? The backlash began in Sorority Circle, catty names and ill-sourced rumors I shall not repeat. The awe-struck boys and envious co-eds had one thing in common: precious few had actually met the young lady around whom so much speculation was spun.
A week or so into the school year, I came home to my frat house from an afternoon's classes to find two freshman girls, one tall and one short, sitting on the front porch beside our house mother. We were introduced. I found them pleasant and funny, they seemed to accept my meager charms. I invited them to dinner, they were the perfect guests. It was a matter of days before I connected the dots--the tall girl was the child of the famous actors. She was totally unlike the infamy that had preceded her. We became good friends, in spite of silly campus chatter.
In time, the Hollywood child joined the family business (so to speak), and developed her own successful career in front of the camera. Her new career on the path of fame led her away from old friends. It was not so much that we were discarded, rather that we became separated by the walls built around her to hold back the tide of public scrutiny. College friendships truncated by her rise to fame, small casualties of her success. I only hope that she is happy on her side of that divide; by all accounts, she is doing well enough without us.
"Rich?" I've often said, "Well, yes, the advantages of wealth are quite apparent. But famous? No, thank you very much." I have moved a bit in my life, and lived in large cities and small communities. There are great advantages to being an anonymous observer and quiet participant in such circumstances. The all-seeing omniscient walking among the throngs of fascinating people, unfettered by the bounds of recognition, inspired by the newness of sociological discoveries. Fellow writers take note.
So we write. We write what we observe, what we percieve, what we imagine. Gleaning information, captivated by the impressions garnered through those observations, we distill ideas, weave stories, construct narratives and create. Writers are as varied as the persons they observe, but I trust it is fair to say that we desire to have have our writing appreciated. I dare say that any, if not all, appreciation that comes the way of a writer is welcome; accolades are the stuff that dreams are made of.
Perhaps the aspiring writer dreams of such great success that s/he is even published. The published work is well-received, the publicity machine is geared up and ready to go. Success, as measured by the twin demons Wealth and Fame, tantalizing, are just beyond our reach...but first, the beast must be fed: the Book Tour awaits.
Cut and paste the link below and remember to be careful what you wish for.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nichole-bernier-/on-fandom-i-love-your-boo_b_2963123.html
I think so many people want to win the lottery or come into money because they think it will solve all their problems and allow them to get stuff to impress others. But it usually comes at a price money can't buy. Just look at the Hollywood crowd, many are unhappy or have drug/alcohol problems.
ReplyDeleteI think all of us wish for what we don't have, we just need to be wishing for the right things for the right reasons.
I happened to see that Hollywood Girl some many years after her brief college daze. She was now an author, and had scheduled a book signing near San Francisco. I was really excited to see her again. I took my wife, who had also been a good friend of the Hollywood Girl, and our daughters to see my old friend again. I even dug out my old frat shirt...just to help to look like an old frat bro. Oh! the crush of humility when she didn't remember the Ungerdog. Even though she cried on my shoulder one afternoon, all I was to her now was a familiar face from her past. She didn't even remember Martini Club. But, to her credit, she remembered the house fight song! I knew that she was still the same person inside though...and if I could just spend a little time with her, I'd be able to help her remember our friendship. But, within a minute, or maybe 30 seconds, we had to part our ways again...it was time for her to sign another book for the next person in line.
ReplyDeleteCheers to old friends, even the ones that don't remember us.
PS If I ever become famous, I hope I become rich too...so I can hire someone to whisper in my ear and tell me who ever one is. But, I'm happy enough without the fame and money and just having a familiar face.
You're right. Giving up the privacy has been tough on so many "stars". Look at how they are portrayed in the tabloids.
ReplyDeleteSome lines that struck me in your piece today: "There are great advantages to being an anonymous observer and quiet participant in such circumstances. The all-seeing omniscient walking among the throngs of fascinating people, unfettered by the bounds of recognition, inspired by the newness of sociological discoveries."
Thank you. xoA